Friday, May 13, 2011

Dear Shit Detective:

Dear Shit Detective:

Today a friend of mine was struck by an urgent need to visit the public restroom while running the path around the lake. This friend of mine had neither the time nor the inclination to fashion a seat cover out of toilet paper, so he squatted hovering over the seat. Unfortunately the drop was too far and built up too much velocity. Public toilet water splashed upwards directly into his asshole. Will this friend of mine catch a disease?

Severely Clenched

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

No person who is overcome by the need to let loose in a public place should be caught dead without some sort of sanitizer.
With that said, I will tell you that the festering ooze that bubbles and transforms in the nether regions of a port a potty are beyond humanities ability to categorize or control.
Get this doomed sad sack to a CDC or Hazmat equipped medical unit ASAP.
I'll call NIH.